The Fantasy Family and the Real One: Exploring family dynamics with neurodivergent clients

This two-hour workshop explores the psychological and relational dynamics of family disappointment — particularly in neurodivergent families, where differences in communication, sensory processing, and emotional regulation can heighten relational stress. The holiday season often brings these patterns into sharp focus, reactivating longings for the “fantasy family” — one that feels safe, attuned, and fully accepting.

For many neurodivergent people, family life involves repeated moments of misattunement. Emotional intensity, sensory overload, or differences in pace can make co-regulation difficult. One person’s “quiet space” might feel like rejection to another; a bid for reassurance might overwhelm a partner or parent already at their limit. These mismatched needs can create painful cycles of shame, frustration, and withdrawal.